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mchsu
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Location: Sydney, Australia
Gender: Male
Interests: - Anything challenging.
- Thrill seeking activities
- Taking (calculated) risks.
- Lounging and drinking
- Beach
- Self improvement
Expertise: - Expert in nothing
Occupation: Engineering
Industry: Computers (Internet)
Message: message meEmail: email me
MSN: martin_hsu@hotmail.com
Member Since:
6/2/2004
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| Don't feel like writing much these days, can't really think of much worth writing about really. Nothing seems like a big deal anymore. I guess I have simply been hardened up by life. The brutality of truth, can numb anyone's senses or it will simply kill you. There is indeed beauty left in this world, however I do not find it in many city dwellers anymore. Anything that survives past 25 years in a modern city , will surely have to have shed the innocence and beauty of youthful thinking into jungle survival. We live in a society where honesty is a trait for the weak and deceit an almost admired skill to have for the strong and successful. Yes that is the brutal truth of modern day life, I simply accept and learn. Maybe i'm still an idealist, but I still secretly am looking for that "childish beauty" though in someone. | | |
| I started pondering about my year in 2009, and all I can say is, its been the toughest year to date and at the same time a year of the greatest personal and spiritual growth. 2009 for me was a year to cross personal boundaries, to take risks, and to learn to overcome laziness and fear of change. I've learnt that letting go and giving up on something that doesnt make you happy is extremely painful when you are so comfortable with it. I've learnt that money (greed to be exact) can turn people very ugly and ultimately ineffective. Ive learnt that it is always easier to blame other people who things go wrong, but often you had a part to play in it as well. All in all, I hope 2010 will new experiences, and allow me to become a better person and find happiness. | | |
| Life is sometimes complicated, life is sometimes unfair, but most of all life always unpredicatble. Been faced with some major issues recently that has been difficult to work through , I found myself deeply troubled . Then as always just when the I couldn't fall any deeper into this hole, a light comes through the darkness and offers me a rope to pull up. The person on the other end of the rope is an old acquaintence from the pages of history and probably the most unlikely given historic reasons. I was shown a kindness and generosity with no desire to want anything in return. No judgments even when my flaws were clearly there, I was offered nothing more than the generosity of friendship, pure and simple. I did not seek sympathy, nor a shoulder to cry on, or even ask to be pulled out of the hole, I just needed a friend to talk to.
In this troubling and difficult period, perhaps the most challenging to date, you stood out amongst the crowd and showed a side I have not seen before. A gentle smile appears on my face to see the irony and humour in this, its the first genuine smile in many months.
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| I been struggling internally to deal with the recent events that have occurred to me. Its a real test of my mental toughness , and its not easy. While I was on a on a 4am taxi ride in Perth I came across a very interesting old man, and it just goes to show that there really is someone upstairs watching out for me. I was deeply troubled at the time, very stressed with the work I needed to do that morning and also personal affairs. The man somehow could see that I needed help, and offered me a few pieces of words that still resonate within me. He said to me....the reason you have so these problems, is because fundamentally you don't know what you want in your life. So simple!!! But that really is it, the root alot of modern day suffering and issues is simply because we just dont know what we want and thus make poor decisions. | | |
| Enjoying the brilliant sunset out stretched outside the window, I begin to reminisce all those times we shared together. The good and the bad, both interwind together, each complementing each other for without the bad , we cannot see the good. It is funny because looking back now I miss those fights now in a strange sort of way. I miss the simple every day things we used to do together, those little things really are the most special. We've had our doubts, legimate they were, and it festered like cancer , poisioning the well slowly. Yet we were so close..... almost like family. 2 months on, and after the dust from the war has finally settled, I realise that there was no winner , we both lost something special. After the heat is gone....all I feel is I have lost something very close to me.... the rest of the history doesnt matter to me anymore. | | |
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